I retired.  Yes, it’s only been 3 months. But a lot has happened in these 3 months.  I’ve gone through a couple of viral illnesses, said goodbye to my youngest son who moved overseas, opened a “retirement business,” started a fun job working for a company I believe in, and now dealing with my father’s impending death.  Yes, a lot has happened.

I was blessed to be able to leave my job in time to spend some time with my son and his family before they left for Italy for 3 years.  I was blessed to have enough savings to carry us through until my retirement funds could kick in.  I was blessed to have time to write for my new endeavor – Hope Breastfeeding Support – and learn how to manage my website.  I’m learning that, yes, old dogs can learn new tricks.  I’ve been blessed to have a couple of clients in that endeavor.

But I’m still not settled in my path.  I’m not sure if my “business” will succeed – or that I even want it to.  The stress and responsibility of being “it” for my clients is hard.  I find it hard to gracefully back out when they still have needs – and I have gone far beyond the limits I set up.  And with this continuing vacillation in my soul, it’s hard for me to commit to other opportunities.  I hate to say no, but I don’t want to say yes and not be able to keep my promises.

Retirement is both easier and harder than I thought.  There are more opportunities than I expected, but I find that aging has taken away some of my stamina.  My prayer is that I will stay close to God and listen to His voice wherever He may lead.